Motherhood can be a lonely job.
You are surrounded by little souls, but ones constantly in need of life sustaining attention; and most days by afternoon to evening there’s about zero energy left for adult connections (as if there’s time anyway). And some days getting out of the house to meet that friend for lunch or go to story time sounds so great in theory, but is missing naptime (and the next three days of dire repercussions) worth it? Plus that’s a total of six socks, three pairs of (matching) boots, three winter coats, buckling into car seats, letting out the dog before we go before locking him up... hmm, yeah, maybe today we’ll just stay home.
It can feel rather isolating.
I literally remember thinking to myself on a rare date night after our second was born,
“I come from a long time ago, and a galaxy far, far, away...” we were walking through the streets of a trendy little downtown area and first of all, the couples all looked like teenagers to me; and second of all; apparently I needed to go home and torch my entire wardrobe because it was feeling 2015 fresh n’ fly. I felt so completely irrelevant. Outdated. Outcast by society. The world had totally moved on and it hadn’t even noticed I’d been gone.
That was a lonely, low point.
(Crop tops making a fashion resurgence in my immediate post partum state did not help any).
As a child, the story of the woman made well by mere touch of Jesus’ garment amazed me; but my awe was focused then, understandably so, on the incredible healing power that such a slight encounter could bring about. Still amazes me. But I have found new awe.
That woman in the story-
The loneliest woman.
Her story is brief, succinctly recounted in gospels Matthew, Mark, and Luke; the account very much the same with gleaning of additional details here and there from the three accounts.
This lady was sick for twelve years- not just sick, but bleeding and worsening in spite of spending everything she had on multiple doctors.
Bleeding for twelve years- anemic, weak, fatigued, likely susceptible to other illness.
But here’s the real catch- in Jesus time this was so obvious it didn’t need stated; for us, it requires a little research and reading between the lines.
This woman was considered “unclean” according to rules of those days, the Law of Moses.
She was cut off, ostracized from society- and had been for twelve years. (If my kids are sick and I’m isolated for a week, I feel like I’m going to lose it.)
TWELVE YEARS.
But she heard about this miraculous Jesus character, and in spite of all the doctors’ failures, had the faith to think, “If I just touch his clothes, I will be healed.” (Mark 5:28)
She didn’t want to be noticed- in fact, if she was caught touching Jesus, that would mean according to society’s laws, Jesus would then be ceremonially unclean. He’d need to perform washing rituals and even then would remain “unclean” until that evening (Leviticus 15:27).
That’s why Jesus calls her out, I believe.
He asks who touched him, in the midst of a pressing crowd- you can almost see his disciples rolling their eyes with an “are you kidding me right now.”
But it’s not a question of God’s omniscience here; Jesus knew exactly who touched him.
The woman already knew she was healed- we’re told she instantly felt it- but she is still fearful and trembling at the feet of Jesus- yet she’s still brave enough speak up, own up to her actions in front of that crowd.
Then Jesus tells her, “Daughter, your faith has healed you. Go in peace and be freed from your suffering.” (Mark 5:34)
Read that again— He says she is healed, AND she is freed from her suffering.
The loneliest woman.
Can you imagine the emotional pain, the depression, the soul suffering?
And with a word- her illness is gone, but bonus; her heart and her soul are made whole.
Because I’m here to tell you; that does NOT happen overnight. You cannot go through a period of being even semi-removed from society, thrown back into “normalcy,” and assume a sound and flawless transition.
The more I study this brief passage, the more awe I’m in. The more layers I realize it has.
This woman knew next to nothing about Jesus. Would have been all rumors she had heard, really. We don’t need to know everything about Jesus or have the Bible all figured out to have a life changing encounter with Him. Takes just a little faith and a brush with His presence.
And it only takes a brush with Him to penetrate our deepest layers, heal our deepest hurts. See the suffering, the lonely places, and hang a “no vacancy” sign on your heart.
“How great is the love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God!” (1 John 3:1)