The faces of this pandemic.
They’re everywhere.
The worried small business owner. The frustrated, screaming child. The haggard healthcare worker. The anxiety ridden, coughing person at home denied a test, not “sick enough” for hospital admission. The vented COVID sufferer, struggling to breathe, isolated from friends and loved ones.
The face here is mine.
Not exactly a picture I’d otherwise post.
My face, full of righteous anger that a loved one was exposed to Covid-19 with no universal precautions. Furious that it’s not a unique situation- PPE are lacking everywhere. My face, full of disbelief that HCW would ever see a day when the CDC would release guidelines saying BANDANAS are acceptable protection as a last resort.
Heart feeling shattered into a thousand pieces that the closest my immune compromised self can get to this person I love, is from behind my car door watching them lean for a brief moment out of bed on the side door; feet away, miles apart. Hopelessness in my eyes- a medical license and zero help to offer. My face; struggling and trying to look and remain strong. Fear creeping in for other family members... my head a jumble of numbers and calculations and incubation periods...
Angry at the ill preparedness of an entire country and health care system.
Frustrated at those who are not taking this pandemic seriously; at those complaining about the governor’s stay at home order.
Fatigued. Tired... My spirit is so, so tired.
And somehow I’m supposed to be thankful-
because that’s what God has called me to be- the verse God’s convicted me with in the past months; before Covid-19 was ever on our radars:
“Give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.”
(1 Thessalonians 5:18)
So I am thankful.
I am so, so thankful that Michigan now has a stay-at-home order in place.
I’m thankful my wonderful husband loves our kids and watched them without question so I could go pray in a driveway.
I am thankful that God is in control and we are not- because He can make a way when we cannot see one.
I’m thankful for faith, even when it’s hard.
I’m thankful for all those healthcare workers and citizens with hearts truly bigger than themselves; putting duty before fear.
I’m thankful we can be still and still know that God is God, and we serve Him and not the American dollar.
I’m thankful that I don’t need to understand everything, that not everything needs to make sense- because I’m not God. Nor do I want to be.
I’m thankful for God’s love for us- for my family and kids, for my loved one fighting coronavirus- and that it’s a love that exceeds even my own, which is something I cannot even begin to comprehend.
I’m thankful that in Jesus, we always have the victory.
❤️
Be safe.
Be thankful.
God WILL see us through.